I will start out by saying that I seem to be plagued by the strangest encounters at the check out lanes as of late, or maybe I just need to get the F out of there more so than I use to so things urk me more. No matter. Really I think people take more liberties with the cash register attendants and those are the ones I actually feel bad for. Can you imagine how many WTF moments they encounter every day?!
Anyways, I was at Target the other day and the lady in front of me had the attendant go all the way to the back of the store to search for something SHE forgot to pick up. All while I waited 10-15 minutes for her to do so. She also decided why wouldn't it be a great time to have a phone conversation as she had this other person do her bidding. While also referencing to me as the "poor girl who had to wait." There's so many things wrong with this but the thing that urked me the most is she had the liberty to call me a poor GIRL. Yup, I know I look young. However, I am far from a GIRL. I am a grown ass woman with a family, not playing house over here. I was quite satisfied that she happened to be parked next to me so that she could see that when I came out to a hungry baby due to her rudeness that I was far from a child and have a couple of my own to care for. This is just the same if I had referenced her as being the ' middle aged woman' in front of me. Maybe I should have made my own phone call and talked about her in the third person. *eye roll* I am 30 in less than two months...yup hard to believe but I think it's time to stop referencing me as a girl.
With that little bitch fest over, I want to share something with you guys. I will not go into too many details as I don't think labor and delivery is in many of your lives or on the horizon, but there is a connection in life none the less. Some of you know I had a really traumatic first experience with my first labor/delivery experience. I ended up after 31 hours with a cesarean in which I did not want. The physical recovery and emotional turmoil that resulted kept me toiled up for a long time. Coupled with the fact weebrooke was not an easy babe. I had a lot to work through. My transition into motherhood was much more difficult than I had ever imaged. So when weebrooke2.0 came to be, I had even more work to do. The work of going against a system (medical/hospital) that had once failed me. For this to happen I had to do a lot of soul searching, research, & planning. One thing a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) woman said to me was "You can't do the same thing and expect different results." That really struck a cord with me. For those that don't know the cesarean rates are incredibly high (too high) and most choose to have a repeat c/s when that actually is most often the more dangerous choice. So armed with all the information and personal gusto I could manage, I decided to pursue a home birth. Yes, a home birth after a cesarean section. Most would call me crazy, which is why I had kept it to myself beyond close friends and select family. Basically I didn't tell someone if I knew their reaction wouldn't be total and utter support. That's a wise lesson I have learned in life some years earlier...
Long story short. I had a very successful home birth, in four hours. For those that don't know. That's an incredibly short labor/delivery! I want to say though it was an even harder journey than my entrance into motherhood. I had to defy norms, opinions, and my own personal doubts. In the end though, I followed my intuition. It's why my midwife took me on (I am not a case they normally take on)...my connection to self. I say all of this because maybe you, yourself are going through something. Maybe it feels extremely scary or hard to take a step in a direction not normally followed. However, I encourage you to do so. One of the biggest lessons I learned through this process was that IF I did have another c/s I was going to OK. Even if you don't meet the goal...what did you learn along the way? I have no doubt you are and will be a stronger person because of it. I had to get to that place and it only happened closer to actual labor. Which was that if I was strong enough to make this choice to have a home birth, that I was definitely strong enough to have another c/s if that was what was meant for me.
With all of that being said, I feel amazing. I feel incredibly strong, capable and like a weight has been lifted. I feel light and happy. More aware and trusting of that voice that all of us have inside of us. So I wanted to share this with you...so that you can listen a little deeper to what your personal trials and tribulations are. And know, no matter what. You are strong. You are capable. No one singular experience can completely define us but they can come together to create a more defined person. Work hard and you can get to where you need to be, whether that is emotionally, physically or both (I did A LOT of all of those things to make it to where I needed to be). I hope this story can give to you in some way. If so I have met my goal for today. *smile*
I also want to touch on lactation videos. I keep getting a lot of request and questions if I have any coming out. I don't. The only way I am going to make one is if some one orders a custom. That quote has been going out at $400 for 10 minutes. So if this is something for you. Send me an e-mail. I am on maternity leave (until January 18'), this is a niche market, and obviously I only produce milk for a time. That quote is actually quite average not even taking into consideration those things previously mentioned. So read here and then send me a note (firstname.lastname@example.org) to see what we can work out!
I ALSO have 12 lactation photos. These went out to your purchasable iwantclips message service if you are one of my clients there OR you can send $20 amazon gift card to my email and I will send those your way. They are a series of similar photos taken in the bath during milk let down. Different angles, yes nude of course! As always thanks for your support, each and every one of you in each and every way. All of these things and more make not only you amazing, but allow me to be amazing too.
(and weebrooke and weebrooke2.0) What a growing family OH MY! :D